I've returned from Rome almost a week ago. Frankly, it all seems so surreal. Looking at the world around me, it doesn't seem like I ever left. Rome feels like a distant dream...
The dome of St. Peter's Basilica looming over the city. The cobblestone streets. The silent and humble Bernini sculptures around the city. The mountains and hills that surrounded me. They all seem like images from someone's life other than my own.
People seemed so shock when they ran into me. They often did a double take or look confused. They say that I seem tanner (thanks to the Italian sun) and my hair is longer. Many of them claim that they didn't even know I had curly hair. They say I look more European. I wonder if it's true or if the fact that I was in Europe that paints such an illusion in their minds.
I am glad to be home. Being in Rome made me appreciate what I have here in Chicago. Perhaps I wasn't able to fully appreciate Italy as much due to my sight being so fixated on returning home. It wasn't until I was nearing the end of my journey that I was able to embrace Rome for what it had offered me. Perhaps it wasn't Italy that I fell in love with in the first place, but the image of Italy that foreigners have of the country and its people. I'm fine with that. Perhaps on my return to the Eternal City, it will be a much more fulfilling experience.
Friends have been asking me if I loved the experience. If it was worth it. I tell them that I did love it and spout all these positive things about my travels. However, internally, I am still questioning as to whether it was worth it. Sure, I was able to get away from the American way of life and see things that most people cannot even fathom of seeing in their lifetime. But was it worth it? Was it worth doing at this point in my life? Maybe later down the road I will realize the answer to that question. At the moment, I can only think of the things I must take care of now due to my travels:
If I did learn anything from my travels, it's this... Never be afraid of taking chances. Fear regret more than fear itself. The dome of St. Peter's Basilica looming over the city. The cobblestone streets. The silent and humble Bernini sculptures around the city. The mountains and hills that surrounded me. They all seem like images from someone's life other than my own.
People seemed so shock when they ran into me. They often did a double take or look confused. They say that I seem tanner (thanks to the Italian sun) and my hair is longer. Many of them claim that they didn't even know I had curly hair. They say I look more European. I wonder if it's true or if the fact that I was in Europe that paints such an illusion in their minds.
I am glad to be home. Being in Rome made me appreciate what I have here in Chicago. Perhaps I wasn't able to fully appreciate Italy as much due to my sight being so fixated on returning home. It wasn't until I was nearing the end of my journey that I was able to embrace Rome for what it had offered me. Perhaps it wasn't Italy that I fell in love with in the first place, but the image of Italy that foreigners have of the country and its people. I'm fine with that. Perhaps on my return to the Eternal City, it will be a much more fulfilling experience.
Friends have been asking me if I loved the experience. If it was worth it. I tell them that I did love it and spout all these positive things about my travels. However, internally, I am still questioning as to whether it was worth it. Sure, I was able to get away from the American way of life and see things that most people cannot even fathom of seeing in their lifetime. But was it worth it? Was it worth doing at this point in my life? Maybe later down the road I will realize the answer to that question. At the moment, I can only think of the things I must take care of now due to my travels:
- Find a job
- Find an apartment
- Find an internship (to finish my psychology degree)
I think it was an enriching experience for you, the negatives along with the positives. I've always thought that relativity is the most important concept in life; it explains so much about human behavior and satisfaction with life. Wonder if you can get your old job back? Another gay guy (friend with benefits?) to share the expenses of an apartment would help. - Wayne :)
ReplyDeleteI think it was worth it and you'll grow to realize it.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you did fine. Welcome back and good luck.
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