Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Holy Shit

Reality recently hit me. I'm basically an adult now. It didn't hit me until I went to my first day of school yesterday. For the previous two years, I've been living on campus and just coming back home for the summer. Now that I'm commuting from home, everything seems so different... more real.

I guess this is how the real world feels; living a few miles away from all your friends instead of living in the same building or even just across campus from one another. I no longer belong to that environment of quasi-reality, where everyone lives within this small bubble between childhood naivety and the unfiltered reality. It feels weird. It feels kind of sad.  I realized that childhood isn't a part of life that gracefully fades away, but something that you one day just realize is no longer a part of you. It's not scary, just sad and brings up a sense of nostalgia.

This year didn't start off as exciting as last year, and last year wasn't as exciting as my freshman year. We're truly adults now and it's surprising. In just a little over a year, I'll either have a full-time job or be living in the streets. One of my friends will give birth to her baby in less than a year... She'll be giving birth to the next generation, the generation that will take our place.  No more will there be three month summer vacations. Instead, there will be the two weeks per year sort of vacations.

Life shouldn't be like that. It shouldn't feel like this... Why does it feel like a part of my life is ending? I no longer feel the excitement I felt when high school ended, where I looked forward to what was coming next. Now, I just await the uncertainty of the coming tomorrows.

5 comments:

  1. The bottom line KC is that the world runs on money and you need to place yourself in a position for employment that is reasonably secure and has potential for decent pay. The fact that you are completing higher education should be comforting to you. I fondly remember the wild freedom I had as a kid when I went out the front door; no such thing as 'helicopter parents' and cellphones back then. - Wayne :)

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  2. I hear that back in the day, as a college senior, corporate recruiters would come to YOU. They would give you a presentation showing why you should want to work for them. I had cousins graduating who would tell me the number of offers they were getting, and stressing out as to which one they would choose.

    It's a different world today than it was when I was a "kid".

    "BZ"............... "FOGGY"...................

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  3. The "real world" sucks. Nothing but routine and the two week vacation. Change your major and stay in school for another 3 years.

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  4. i felt the same way before KC. but soon when you're much more older, you'll feel that every stage that is ending is the start of a new. so make the most of what you are in now for that will not be there forever...

    good luck and God bless young fellow!

    JJRod'z

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  5. You said it yourself, KC, "It shouldn't feel like this." I used to feel the same way a year ago. But I started to realize that there is so much in life to enjoy other than your childhood. There are much more exciting things that you would be able to try. It is just a matter of perspective.

    Enjoy life, KC!

    New follower here!

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